Chat or rant, adult content, spam, insulting other members, show more. Harm to minors, violence or threats, harassment or privacy invasion, impersonation or misrepresentation, fraud or phishing, show more. My sister is dating a loser? My sister is Her bf is My sister was a day care assistant teacher but left to make more money as a baby sitter. She is going to school to be a teacher.
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My sister is dating this total loser!?
Every Friday at 3PM! Search titles only Posted by Member: Separate names with a comma. Search this thread only Search this forum only Display results as threads. What to do if your sister or daughter is dating a loser? Nov 10, Messages: Mar 8, 1. Their reaction is emotionally intense, a behavior they use to keep you an emotional prisoner.
If you go back to them, you actually fear a worse reaction if you threaten to leave again making you a prisoner and they later frequently recall the incident to you as further evidence of what a bad person you are.
Remember, if your prize dog jumps the fence and escapes, if you get him back you build a higher fence. If you have an individual activity, they demand that they accompany you, making you feel miserable during the entire activity.
The idea behind this is to prevent you from having fun or interests other than those which they totally control. If you speak to a member of the opposite sex, you receive twenty questions about how you know them. They will notice the type of mud on your car, question why you shop certain places, and question why you called a friend, why the friend called you, and so forth.Woman Claims Sister Would Rather Be With 'Loser' Boyfriend In A Tent Than Raise Her Kids
They may begin to tell you what to wear, what to listen to in music, and how to behave in public. Eventually, they tell you that you can not talk to certain friends or acquaintances, go certain places, or talk about certain issues in public.
When in public, you quickly learn that any opinion you express may cause them to verbally attack you, either at the time or later. This is another method of destroying your self-esteem and confidence. After months of this technique, they begin telling you how lucky you are to have them — somebody who tolerates someone so inadequate and worthless as you. Keep in mind, this same sense of entitlement will be used against you. If you disobey their desires or demands, or violate one of their rules, they feel they are entitled to punish you in any manner they see fit.
They will notice a change in your personality or your withdrawal. The mention of your family members or friends will spark an angry response from them — eventually placing you in the situation where you stop talking about those you care about, even your own family members. Bad Stories People often let you know about their personality by the stories they tell about themselves. The stories a person tells informs us of how they see themselves, what they think is interesting, and what they think will impress you.
A humorous individual will tell funny stories on himself. They may tell you about past relationships and in every case, they assure you that they were treated horribly despite how wonderful they were to that person.
My sister is dating a loser
Waitresses, clerks, or other neutral individuals will be treated badly. A mentally healthy person is consistent, they treat almost all people the same way all the time. If you find yourself dating a man who treats you like a queen and other females like dirt — hit the road. The Reputation As mentioned, mentally healthy individuals are consistent in their personality and their behavior.
Pay attention to the reputation. If the reputation has two sides, good and bad, your risk is high. You will be dealing with the bad side once the honeymoon is over in the relationship. Emotionally healthy and moral individuals will not tolerate friendships with losers that treat others so badly. You become paranoid as well — being careful what you wear and say. Nonviolent males find themselves in physical fights with female losers.
Nonviolent females find themselves yelling and screaming when they can no longer take the verbal abuse or intimidation. In emotional and physical self-defense, we behave differently and oddly. If you are involved in a relationship with one of these versions, you may require professional and legal assistance to save yourself.
Physical Abuser Physical abusers begin the relationship with physical moving — shoving, pushing, forcing, etc. Getting away from physical abusers often requires the assistance of family, law enforcement agencies, or local abuse agencies. Female losers often physically attack their partner, break car windows, or behave with such violence that the male partner is forced to physically protect himself from the assault.
They may fake terminal illness, pregnancy, or disease. If you try to end the relationship, they react violently and give you the impression that you, your friends, or your family are in serious danger.
It seems like he's a control freak and if they do get married, say goodbye to your sister! I mean he will do everything needed to keep her from seeing you and your family. I have this same situation with my childhood friend and his wife.
After they got married, my communication with him stopped! Like you, I use to have a great relationship with my friend we hung out a lot! But after he started dating her, he suddenly lost a lot of weight stress and said everything was fine. Yeah right, I can obviously see there is a problem!
Yes it is her life! But you should at least tell her how you feel this? But its really up to her to decide what's best for her! Four years isn't necessarily long enough to date to get married. A lot of men don't really settle into the idea of getting married until their late 20s. Some are a little slow. And it sounds like your sister herself is fairly young - 23?
So she's been dating this guy since her teens or so? Lots of couples in which one or both people are not yet in their mids will date for four or more years before getting engaged. You are very smart to note, however, that the odds of getting engaged drop as the years go by. It's not the length in itself that speaks volumes. But after so long, we have a decent enough idea of our partner and a decent enough idea of whether or not it will work out.
After 4 years, you're not going to be learning as rapidly about your partner as you may have in the first year or two. Usually it takes so long to get engaged because one or more partners don't want to But there's really nothing you can do here.
Several years ago, I dated an absolute jerk that my brother hated. To be fair, I even hated the guy after a while. But he respected me enough not to intervene, and he was a listening ear when I complained about him and finally decided to leave him.
Afterward, he let me know how long he'd had misgivings about my ex. You have to respect her. Be there for her. Try to encourage her to get out more or invite her along when you're participating in an activity. Getting her out there may get her out of her funk and remind her that she doesn't need a loser.