Finding the right person doesn't mean you have to settle, but sometimes you might need to lower your dating standards. I see women constantly ignoring wonderful guys simply because they don't meet every expectation. Everyone needs standards, but we've all met those people with highly unrealistic standards that even movie characters couldn't live up to. Take a few minutes and see if you might need to lower your dating standards. The most obvious sign that you should lower your dating standards is if you have a lengthy list of requirements for the ideal mate. I had a small list of standards, but they would have fit on a small index card with plenty of room leftover.
And fortunately, there are a few scientists on the case. Almost 9 in 10 Americans believe they have a soul mate, says Tashiro, but only 3 in 10 find enduring partnerships that do not end in divorce, separation or chronic unhappiness. Clearly something is going wrong — and it starts with our expectations.
Lowering your standards in dating
For example, say a bachelorette enters a room of male bachelors who represent the broader U. Or, as Tashiro puts it, returning to our alcohol analogy: Which is why Tashiro advocates a new approach to dating, one that is not so much about lowering standards as giving yourself better ones.
And, just like with baseball, it starts with trying to ignore the superficial indices of value — attractiveness, wealth — in favor of hidden attributes with a stronger correlation to long-term relationship success.
Citing research that finds no reliable link between income level or physical attractiveness and relationship satisfaction, Tashiro steers his readers towards traits such as agreeableness. But can nice guys and gals really finish first? And is it possible to make thoughtful, strategic choices when it comes to relationships? The Gold Coast used to be a gravy train for Republicans, but it could be at risk for the elections.
I hate to see women lower their standards and accept jerks instead of holding out for a decent guy.
However, I also hate seeing women who expect their dates to treat them like a queen while they're rude and disrespectful. Do you turn away guys that won't wait on you hand and foot? Do you make him feel bad if a meal or gift isn't expensive enough? You may just have a queen complex. Give a guy a break and lower your standards to accept guys who are polite, respectful and honest instead of asking him to be your slave.
I couldn't believe how many of my friends wouldn't even consider dating a guy unless he made a certain amount of money.
I'm not saying you should lower your standards to the point where the guy is a complete bum, but money isn't everything. Love isn't about having the biggest house in the richest neighborhood or going on extravagant trips all the time.
If I want expensive things, I can work and buy them myself. Date a guy for who he is, not how much he makes. Odds are, you're not going to find Channing Tatum's long lost twin. I know that TV and movie characters aren't real, but some women don't. They're designed to seem flawless and dreamy.
Real people just aren't like that. If your list of dating standards looks more like a romance movie lead casting call, it might be time to tone it down a bit. What is it you like most about those characters? Look for those qualities and not an exact replica. Your date doesn't just magically fall from the sky with no previous friends, family or hobbies.
9 Signs You Might Need to Lower Your Dating Standards ...
The guy has a life and he's still going to have that life after he meets you. Some women expect men to drop everything for them. For instance, I watched several women dump great guys simply because they wanted to hang out with their guy friends once a week.Lowering Your Dating Standards - Preacher Lawson - Stand-Up Comedy
Don't expect guys to suddenly leave their life behind and be at your beck and call. You may as well date a mannequin.
Doing that you'll get the perfection you're apparently consumed with finding. Imagine all the brilliant, funny, eloquent, educated, charming real women who are dating well rounded, like minded partners you will not be making bored and miserable with your shallow standards.
They are sending a collective "thanks, but no thanks" to men like you. Related Questions How do feminist women evaluate their potential partners?
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