There's a circular bed under one of the bay windows. Otherwise, it's a pretty normal living room. Couches, a few sparsely populated bookshelves. One set of the windows look out onto Geary, at the traffic that whizzes by, the Muni buses and commuters. They leave their curtains open.
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You are both always prepared to lie for each other at social gatherings—to bail each other out of potentially awkward situations, or to save each other from boring conversations. Romantic movie scenes trigger your inner cornball and lead to a telling thigh rub or a brief but intense moment of eye contact.
Watching other people have sex on screen makes you want each other so badly, you sometimes hit pause to satisfy your urges before finishing a movie or TV show. You think of all your past relationships as the practice rounds that prepared you for the main event. We live together, we know each other intimately, and we talk about growing old together regularly. When I met a guy I could see myself dating long-term, I used a little reverse psychology to prove my theory.
If you're clocking a weekly spot with your bae, this is a great sign that they value your time together.
Casual snaps and texts throughout the week definitely bank you a couple points, too, as you're becoming apart of their day-to-day life. A consistent 2AM "U up?
That's what sloppy, end-of-night snap-texts are for. Though we're all prone to empty promises sometimes, it's rare that you'd say "let's hang out" to someone who's personality is drier than the Sahara. They like you, and they wanna keep doing cool shit with you. If you're seeing your S.
Im dating a couple
O on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday - oh baby. This is prime going out time that they could easily reserve for friends or other dates for crying out loud. But they're not out with them - they're out with you! This also applies to days off for all our homies out there who aren't working s. If you are out and about trying new things and making fun memories - outside the sheets - there's a good chance they want to do more than hook-up with you.
You message eachother about your days, what's going on, and how life is going.
If you can't go a day without messaging eachother or feel weird not hearing from them for a couple hours, it's probably a thing. Because you're in a good place and that's a great feeling. If you glance at your S. O's phone and there isn't a campfire or a buzzing bee, maybe you're on the same page.
Otherwise, it's a pretty normal living room. Couches, a few sparsely populated bookshelves. One set of the windows look out onto Geary, at the traffic that whizzes by, the Muni buses and commuters. They leave their curtains open. I'm seated on a couch with Miri, and Ben is in an armchair across from us. On the windowsill next to me, my tea casts a shadow on the glass. Miri and Ben cast each other a look.
Theirs is a dry home, one of the many things that make it a curious establishment to me. It's a concession they're willing to make, but I can tell they both feel a little uneasy, the way their eyes keep meeting, trying not to meet. Adults, like, take ownership of their wants, right? I do want to be there.
This is my second date with Ben, but my first with Miri. We'd met online -- they'd messaged me from an account that looked like it was Miri's, but listed pictures of both of them.
They're a gorgeous couple, married for years. Both of them appear squarely outside my league. So when, on our first date, Ben told me he was a competitive triathlete, I just laughed. Of course he was. But when he told me they were both sex therapists, I was genuinely surprised. I asked a lot of questions, but I still don't really understand what their session-to-session work life is like.
Nor do I completely understand the reason for having the circular bed in their living room.
I Dated A Married Couple
That's where they practice, that much is clear. This is also where we all have sex together. He was curious about the mechanics of our encounters, down to the smallest detail, and not for the reasons I initially suspected.
I suspected it aroused him.
Ultimately, I learned, it was his way of trying to understand my desires. At the time, we were still trying to be polyamorous -- having realized we were in love, but also dubious of monogamy -- and while the endeavor made us both uncomfortable we were also both deeply invested in seeking an arrangement that suited us. And part of that entailed being honest about the need for varied sexual attention. Coincidentally, Adam is also neighbors with Ben and Miri.
Now, since I've moved in with Adam, we're all neighbors. I've only seen Ben once, fleetingly, in the market. I could tell he saw me too, in a moment of passing.